Weddings and the Single Guy
Spring is in the air and those wedding plans started many months ago are now coming together. But for a single, unattached guy, what does this all mean? It means being invited to a wedding and having to sit at the dreaded "singles" table. Sure there is perhaps the possibility of meeting that special someone at this table but it just isn't as simple as that sometimes.
I was at my best friend's wedding in September 1999 and she placed me at the "singles" table. It was a table that would soon see five men and two women scoping each other out. The numbers already were not in my favor. Add to that the fact that I had previously dated one of the women, Miss Apartment Hunter, and I had no choice but to focus my attention on the one woman remaining. I imagined this was how it would be if I were trapped on a deserted island with a woman I had never met before.
Trapped between Miss Apartment Hunter on my left and a guy who I had heard was a very charming playboy type on my right, I was the last to be seated at this table. We all introduced ourselves and talked about how we knew the bride since we were all friends of hers. One of the guys sitting at this special "singles" table told us that he was engaged to one of the bridesmaids. "Whew, at least that's one less guy to worry about," I thought.
The remaining woman, Miss New York, sat almost directly across from me, flanked on her left by the engaged guy and flanked on the right by an Asian American Alfred E. Newman-looking guy. I figured my competition was now going to be the one remaining guy (Mr. Musician) sitting to the right of Mr. Charming Playboy or Mr. Charming Playboy himself. I began talking to Mr. Charming Playboy and Mr. Musician and quickly tried to assess who they might be interested in.
Oddly enough, all three of us got along great and soon were joking and talking as if we had been buds for years. We got the rest of the table to join in and we all had some good laughs. A guy's sense of humor always is an attractive quality from what my women friends have told me. I figured I was scoring points on the laugh meter, if nothing else.
I quickly figured out that Mr. Charming Playboy was eyeing Miss New York at the table. He offered his jacket to Miss Apartment Hunter when a gust of wind blew by while we were eating our dinner (the dinner reception was outdoors). I think he was trying to win points by showing Miss New York that he was a gentlemen.
"Quite sneaky," I thought, "a guy who definitely knows how to work it."
I should have taken notes on this smooth operator. Miss New York seemed to be impressed. Dashed were any slim hopes of me coming away from the "singles" table as a champ, I thought.
Dinner came to its inevitable conclusion and it was time to go indoors for dancing. Mr. Alfred E. Newman disappeared before the dancing was started. Perhaps scared of dancing in front of people? All I can say is thank goodness for group dancing at weddings because my only other choice at this point was to ask some old married woman to dance.
I danced to a few songs and spent time talking to other people I knew at the wedding. While chatting with a friend I noticed that Mr. Charming Playboy and Miss New York had mysteriously disappeared for about 30 minutes. When they returned to the dance area I saw them secretly exchanging telephone numbers. Score! Mr. Charming Playboy made his exit soon after but Miss New York stayed.
Mr. Musician asked Miss Apartment Hunter to dance and they were out on the dance floor for about 20 minutes before she mysteriously disappeared and was never to be seen for the rest of the evening. At this point it did not appear to be a very successful evening for either one of us remaining single guys.
However, by the end of the evening I got a chance to dance the second-to-the-last dance with my best friend and when we were done one of her guests came up to her to say goodbye. Since I was standing there, she asked if we had been introduced already.
I responded, "oh yeah, we were sitting at the same table."
"You're a really funny guy. You make me laugh. You're really cool," the guest responded.
It was the best compliment I had heard all evening. Unfortunately for me, the compliment came from the engaged guy.